“How about I smear myself with jam when we get home and
“Sherlock isn’t a fraud, and so isn’t my love
“I bet I can make your pulse increase and your pupils dilate.”
“I want to give you head. And I’m not talking about
“If you’d let me, I’d twiddle you all day and
“I think you’re really brainy. And I mean that in
“I know a man… And I am what he likes.” Submitted
“I’d like to get some from you… And I’m
“I’ll be the knife and you be the Cluedo board: Let
“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but riding crops
“How about you get off of that phone and let me show you
“My idea of a romantic lunch date: Two bags of Quavers
“Honey, you should see me in a crown… and nothing
“I suggest we do that thing where two people who like each
“I would ‘coordinate’ with you and a pair of
“I’d wait for you even if you faked your death and
“I’d like to fiddle with you when I’m thinking–
“I want to grow old, retire, and study bees with you.”
“I’m crazy for you, and not in a Project H.O.U.N.D.
“I don’t have to die if I’ve got you–
“I would wait a year and a half just to serenade you with
“You know, I’ve got a phone. I mean, very clever
“You’re a great man, and I think one day, if I get
“I want to introduce you to my pussy– and I’m
“I like my partners the way I like my wall decorations:
“I have five children.” Okay, so this one’s
“Mrs. Turner has married ones. How about you and I be Mrs.
“Come to my division. We have coffee and doughnuts.”
“I just met you, and this is crazy, but I know everything
“I would come to your flat even if I was on the other side
“When I’m retired and studying bees, will you be
“I named our dog Gladstone because you make me happy and
“Me and the wife were all sorted… until I saw you
“I like your purple shirt. How’d you like to see
“Want to go to Buckingham Palace and color-coordinate our
“I’d let you hold my hand even if you kidnapped me