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These were so expensive that you are now required to clean them every day.  You will kiss them, then clean them and then thank them for letting you clean them.  Any questions?    | Caption Credit: Crystal Chastity

published on: 2014-06-04 13:40:38

Listen, it’s very simple.  Stripped of all boilerplate it

Listen, it’s very simple.  Stripped of all boilerplate it

Sending you to cosmetics school was an excellent investment. 

Sending you to cosmetics school was an excellent investment. 

The only reason I wear these heels is because I know it drives

The only reason I wear these heels is because I know it drives

 When I take the blindfold off keep   your eyes closed until

When I take the blindfold off keep your eyes closed until

I’ll beat you.  I’ll beat you not.  I’ll beat you.  I’ll

I’ll beat you. I’ll beat you not. I’ll beat you. I’ll

Surprise! Tonight we are having completely vanilla sex.  Except

Surprise! Tonight we are having completely vanilla sex. Except